Sports Illustrated:

The Pittsburgh Steelers outside linebacker, TJ Watt, who was close to winning DPOY a season ago, won the award with a monster 22.5-sack season, which tied Michael Strahan’s NFL record. Watt was announced as the NFL defensive player of the year on Thursday during NFL Honors, the league’s annual awards show.

TJ Watt, seconds after finding out that negroes would still own the single season sack record.

In a private correspondance with TJ Watt he told us that he “was kicking himself for not returning the sack year award to the White Aryan Man it belongs to.” Instead TJ will simply have to console himself with Defensive Player of the Year.

Offensive player of the year: Rams WR Cooper Kupp

Jonathan Taylor and Kupp both had remarkable seasons and great arguments to be offensive player of the year. The award went to Kupp, who had a dominant 145-catch, 1,947-yard, 16-touchdown season. He has continued his dominance in the postseason and helped the Rams reach Super Bowl LVI.

Cooper Kupp

We’ve covered Cooper “no porchmonkeys” Kupp before. The winner of the receiving triple crown, yards, catches, touchdowns, made it mostly a forgone conclusion that he would be winning the Offensive Player of the Year. And his social media, KillNiggersOrDieTryin1488, which you can find on, certainly offended all the right people.

“And so then I stomped on his neck.” – Cooper Kupp

NFL MVP: Packers QB Aaron Rodgers

Rodgers won his fourth MVP and second in a row. Rodgers won this award during a season in which he turned 38 years old. Now a lot of attention will turn to what is next for Rodgers and his future with the Packers.

Aaron when he sees a homeopathic cure half off.

We’ve also covered Aaron Rodgers before, in one of our very first articles in fact. At the time he was deliberately infecting the entire NFL with Ebola by not taking Pfizers most profitable product of all time. He later somewhat killed my boner for him by showing up in a star wars t-shirt, unironically I might add.

Nevertheless we’ve had private correspondence with each of these Aryan Warriors, and they’ve all agreed to have a sit down with The Daily Rake at our roundtable. We’re looking forward to it.

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