After slightly underperforming at the box office during its opening weekend, many want to know more about the details behind Pixar’s latest movie, Lightyear. The movie, which is loosely tied into the continuity of the Toy Story universe, follows space commander Buzz Lightyear as he and his commander, Alisha, are stranded on a planet lightyears from Earth and Buzz makes hyperspeed flights to find their way home.

Apparently they also replaced the ginger with whatever this creature is. We’re going for full on Globo Homo Lightyear, so we can’t have any good looking redheads in there. It’s just like they did with that MILF Jen Psaki.

Buzz is very friendly with Alisha and is also respectful of the fact that she is a lesbian. When Buzz discovers that Alisha found love while stranded on an alien planet, he seems not just respectful but actively excited about the news. The same-sex kiss that has caused such a stir in the film comes as part of a montage of Alisha’s life while Buzz travels off-world. During each flight that Buzz takes, four years pass on the planet where Alisha is stuck.

Apparently they had to censor this in 15 countries, but they made sure to bring back the POZ whenever possible. Kids don’t like pervert stuff, but they’re fine with losing money if it means they can try to groom more children.

So, while Buzz is trying to find a way home, Alisha is building a life for herself, and winds up romantically entangled with a research scientist on the planet. The two share a kiss on their 40th anniversary, and Alisha even tells Buzz that she wouldn’t have met her partner if the two of them hadn’t been stranded. They eventually have kids together and build a whole life with one another.

The Lesbos have children together, somehow. I’m not one to demand more info, but how is this supposed to work exactly? Did they have a threesome with buzz? Is there some orgy scene where this happens, or does the one lesbian just magically get pregnant?

We may never know because you couldn’t pay me to watch this movie, a sentiment seemingly shared with the rest of society. No one wants this pervert shit, but it keeps getting pushed by these perverts all the same. I’ve been told over and over again by koshervatives that these corporations have to compete to provide a product that the people truly want, and yet there is no material evidence that this is the case.


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1 Comment

  1. A lesbian family – the Beyond Beef burger of the relationship world…

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