Billy Eichner has shared his thoughts regarding the meager box office opening for his LGBTQ romantic comedy “Bros,” writing that “straight people, especially in certain parts of the country, just didn’t show up.”

In a thread posted to his official Twitter, Eichner, who wrote, produced and stars in “Bros,” asserted that he is “very proud” of the movie, describing his experience covertly watching a sold out screening in Los Angeles during the weekend.

“Last night I snuck in and sat in the back of a sold out theater playing ‘Bros’ in LA. The audience howled with laughter start to finish, burst into applause at the end and some were wiping away tears as they walked out,” Eichner wrote. “It was truly magical. Really. I am VERY proud of this movie.”

This is probably bullshit, but in fairness, anyone who went to watch garbage is part of a self-selected audience of shitty people, so maybe they did enjoy this. If you watched this trailer and wanted to watch this film, you are a very abnormal person.

I wasn’t originally going to write about this, but this is the most obnoxious, unfunny, and disgusting things I have been exposed to since the Jews killed Christ Santa with Santa Inc. At least we got some absolutely fantastic memes out of that one, and I milked it for all it was worth.

Man that was so much fun, and it’s the same people responsible again!

Imagine bragging about this…

But we’ll get there in a second.

The star also divulged that a theater chain had mounted plans to pull the trailer for “Bros” from its programming due to “gay content,” but Universal eventually convinced the company to maintain its placement in the pre-show rotation. “America, fuck yeah,” Eichner wrote.

“That’s just the world we live in, unfortunately,” Eichner continued. “Even with glowing reviews, great Rotten Tomatoes scores, an A CinemaScore, etc., straight people, especially in certain parts of the country, just didn’t show up for Bros. And that’s disappointing but it is what it is.”

Eichner concluded his thoughts by encouraging “everyone who isn’t a homophobic weirdo” to see “Bros,” writing that it remains “special and uniquely powerful to see this particular story on a big screen.”

Pretty rich for (((Billy Eichner))) to whine about straight people not seeing it, when we find the following at the end of their official trailer.

Literal tranny: Oh my gawd, do you guyz remember straight people? *giggles*

Other tranny: Yeah, they had a nice run. *smirks*

Two catty trannies make fun of 99% of the filmgoing demographic. In shocking turn of events, said 99% of filmgoing demographic decides “hey, maybe fuck you too,” and stays at home. Why would homophobes genocide gay people so?

That isn’t even the only explicit bit of HIV politics in the trailer. Just before that we get the following exchange.

(WTF Am I looking at???) Black Pervert Creature: People are threatening to boycott the museum. You can’t say [Abraham] Lincoln was gay.

No but really, WTF am I looking at?

It’s even creepier in motion, and I think that’s a third tranny in the background just in front of the AIDS flag. Oh wait, nevermind, it’s actually just the first tranny again.

Billy Eichner: If we don’t do this we’re letting the heterosexual terrorist win.

Tranny: There are trans terrorists too. Caitlyn Jenner.

Don’t let all the AIDS distract you from the fact that there’s nothing funny in this trailer. It’s edited in such a way that these are clearly the punchlines, but there’s no actual joke. I don’t even mean that the joke misses the mark, I mean I don’t even understand what they were going for.

Once again I’m getting Santa Inc. flashbacks… and Rangz of Kangz… and Wheel of Time… and She-Hulk… and –

The entire trailer is absolutely revolting. There’s a scene with the two male leads kissing which is viscerally repulsive. Somehow, that isn’t the worst part. That honour goes to the entire family, kids included, twerking while talking about taking it in the ass. No really.

Mystery Meat Father: Maybe you’re both bottoms and that’s the problem.

Roughly Five Year old Daughter: Bottom Diiiick!

Mom: Ooohhhh Bottom diiiiiiiick!

*Entire family starts wiggling their butts*

Billy Eichner: Gay sex was more fun when straight people were uncomfortable with it.

No, trust me Billy, I am still plenty uncomfortable with it. I am even more uncomfortable with children wiggling their asses around after saying “bottom diiiiiiiick.” If you, unlike these five year olds, don’t know what “bottoming,” is, Postmates is here to help you out.

And if you’ve had any wear on tear on your prolapsed asshole, Dr. Goldstein is here to make give you that snazzy new anus you’ve always wanted.

We rejoin Variety to find them bragging about how much Monkeypox was on set.

“Bros” is the first gay rom-com to be given a wide theatrical release by a major studio, as well as the first with an all-openly LGBTQ cast.

Wow, what are the odds of that happening by chance? It’s almost like they discriminated against normal people in order to make that happen, the kind of thing they’d pretend you were LITERALLY GENOCIDING them for if done in reverse.

The film fizzled at the box office this weekend, opening in fourth place with a slim $4.8 million gross from 3,350 locations. Though “Bros” carries a modest $22 million production budget, it will likely struggle to achieve profitability, considering its disappointing debut.

Even so, “Bros” has earned glowing approval from critics and audience polling remains strong. Universal will hope that word-of-mouth provides some staying power for the film in the coming weeks.

Audience polling remains strong, eh? Let’s take a look at the top comments under their own trailer, as of time of writing.

It’s so weird. It’s like I’m seeing a trend here where audiences don’t want Globo Homo Schlomo, but audiences keep getting Globo Homo Schlomo. And lest you think I’m taking a cheap shot at the Hook-nosed types, let’s take a closer look at who was responsible for this Monument to Monkeypox.

Billy Eichner’s Wikipedia:

He was born to a Jewish family and had a Madonna-themed bar mitzvah.

Nicholas Stoller’s Wikipedia:

Stoller was raised Jewish.

Nicholas Stoller

Stoller also directed the movie, which IMDB confirms was produced by (((Judd Apatow))). I don’t even think we need to Wiki Early Life this one goys.

Judd Apatow

I’m getting extremely tired of Hollywood garbage. It’s not just that these people aren’t talented, and it’s not just that they’re perverted jews constantly pushing their AIDS ridden anti-White MESSAGE in this garbage. Frankly, neither is good, but the combination of the two pisses me off to a level I can’t even explain.

12 million views, 19 thousand likes…

Theoretically it should be a good thing that they are so untalented. The worst case scenario would be actually effective enemy propaganda. But this all just reminds me how insanely undemocratic, nepotistic, and astroturfed our society truly is. 

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  1. Good post, maybe because it’s been a long day but the whole queer thing gets so tiresome I can’t even express my distain and nausea anymore. Not worth it.

    But one thing all these photos tell me is my Gaydar is fine-tuned like a honda carburetor, I look at those pics and my retinal neuron shouts “butt wranglers”….Honda… not that PIECE OF CRAP yamaha carb I am currently working on and btw F^^^^^CK corporations, all of them can jump up my butt. Shit-ass 22 gauge wires and crap connectors DESIGNED to fail – Do they think that’s gonna make someone buy a more expensive yamaha piece o crap ? What possible motivation other than screwing with people’s time and lives? American has no decent motorcycles and shove yer harley riding tattoo’d dirtbag leather pants up my butt while er at it. If I wanta sit on top a 1/2 ton car and pretend I’m cool shove me off a cliff – shitty mileage, can’t turn for sheet, TOTAL LOSS OF LIGHTWEIGHT OPEN AIR FLYING ON THE GROUND FREEDOM – am i nuts? what the hell I’m never talked about – “here I’m is…the zomby woof” (zappa).

    1. What the fuck did I just read?

  2. We have finally witnessed the impossible – a monkeypox enjoyer complaining about his opening being too small.

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